Feeding the birds

“I feed the pigeons, I sometimes feed the sparrows too
It gives me a sense of enormous well-being

And then I’m happy for the rest of the day, safe in the knowledge there will always be a bit of my heart devoted to it”

Exactly, Damon Albarn, exactly.

Clearly, feeding the birds is an extension of my wish to provide delicious and nourishing food for any visitor we have. I really like feeding the cat too, and she lives here. But the birds are fascinating and weirdly exciting because of their wildness, delicacy and swift movements. (The very opposite of the cat.) When birds pause mid-flutter, alighting for a moment to snatch a beakful, it feels like a rare honour. My favourite moments come when I’m quietly having a cup of tea outdoors and they forget I’m there. They bestow a precious, momentary trust in accepting my hospitality. And even more so when they grace my garden more than once.

We currently have a few honoured guests to the bird feeders, but I have watched them so closely (and they are fairly few – although I have high hopes of more in future) that I recognise them as individuals. There’s a single fat wood pigeon, who tries in vain to access the feeders meant for smaller birds, only to give up and peck up the discards from the floor below. Last week, the pearl grey bird with bobbing beak was almost snatched up from its ground-level foray by next door’s mean tortoiseshell. Luckily, the cat grabbed just a messy mouthful of fine feathers and the pidge has been substantially more cautious since.

And there are smaller birds too, flirting and flitting around the unwieldy pigeon. A pair of chaffinches – a shy, fluttery, flushed-pink male and a bold, hungry, brown female with a perky crest. A family of 3 goldfinches, tiny and pushy and gaudily colourful. They chatter and chitter and chirp to each other in a constant, gossipy 3-way conversation. There’s a happy-looking, fluffy, round great tit which sits on the fence until the goldfinches clear off. And then finally a tiny, scruffy blue tit who might just be my favourite – but don’t tell the others.

I revel in discovering the likes and dislikes of our bird visitors, peering through the bedroom window as they select sunflower hearts and bits of leftover seedy toast while I dress and brush my teeth. I read contentedly about their habits and habitats, listen to recordings of their songs, accumulate data, hoarding it like a dragon and joyfully imparting little nuggets to anyone who will listen.

I’m inspired by the excitement and passion of my father-in-law Mark, a profoundly kind person and delighted twitcher who very sadly died last year. He is much missed by our whole family, but I feel a strong sense of connection with him as I discover our wealth of wild garden birds – and, of course, feed them too.

Do you ask what the birds say? The Sparrow, the Dove,
The Linnet and Thrush say, “I love and I love!”
In the winter they’re silent -the wind is so strong;
What it says, I don’t know, but it sings a loud song.
But green leaves, and blossoms, and sunny warm weather,
And singing, and loving – all come back together.
But the Lark is so brimful of gladness and love,
The green fields below him, the blue sky above,
That he sings, and he sings, and for ever sings he –
“I love my Love, and my Love loves me!”
— Samuel Taylor Coleridge ‘Answer to a Child’s Question’

Feasts

I delight in cooking for friends and family, I love how happy good food makes everyone and I find it so satisfying to have been the person who made that happen.

We don’t manage a family meal every night of the week due to work commitments, but our Friday night dinner is sacrosanct. Maybe it’s an echo of my Jewish heritage craving a Shabbat meal. The food is always something a bit more special, requiring a bit of effort, and we eat it together at the table with proper manners, no devices and open conversation. We talk about the week, highlights and low points, and what we’re looking forward to at the weekend. No topic is off the table.

I was brought up on rowdy, animated family meals, sharing food and talking (occasionally shouting) about any and all subjects. I’m so glad to be able to introduce that noisy, loving happiness into my own home as an adult, not only for family, but for friends too. I’m intrigued by the mixing of individuals and groups from different parts of my life. Nothing as grand as dinner parties, just informal social gatherings, often accompanied by music and a bottle of prosecco. I could take or leave bars and clubs at this stage in my life (honestly, at pretty much every stage in my life), but the joy of having my people, sitting together and eating something delicous together is unparalleled.

Because I’m one of life’s planners, of course the food is always mulled over extensively and planned out in advance. I like to plot a whole feast, a generous spread of dishes coaxed together, thinking and re-thinking until it feels just right. Here are a few of them.

  • Bbq ribs
  • Fried buttermilk chicken
  • Roast sweet potato wedges
  • Ottolenghi winter slaw
  • Green salad
  • Lime coriander yogurt
  • Patatas bravas
  • Albondigas
  • Chorizo with sherry glaze
  • Sweet potato, onion and spinach tortilla
  • Prawns with chilli, garlic, lemon, parsley
  • Bread
  • Green salad
  • Sliced manchego
  • Beetroot salad
  • Lamb rogan josh
  • Aubergine tomato curry
  • Basmati rice
  • Deep fried crispy bindhi
  • Pani poori
  • Chicken tikka skewers
  • Mango chutney
  • Raita

Meal planning

I don’t know about you, but I like starting the week with a full fridge and ending it with an empty one, without having to throw anything away in between. But the only way I can manage to do this is to make a plan, shop for it and then eat it as planned. It sounds mildly obsessive, and perhaps it is, but it works. And it certainly doesn’t limit what we eat.

Before heading to the supermarket, we decide what we feel like eating each evening of the week, write it down like a menu, and then create a shopping list for those specific meals. Obviously some stuff gets bought every week – cucumber, cherry tomatoes, seedy bread, milk and cheddar cheese are always on the list, amongst many other things. But everything else on the list is destined for specific meals, so there’s no waste. Nothing is bought on a whim, so nothing lurks forgotten in the back of the fridge getting hairy and slimy before being thrown out while you breathe desperately through your mouth to avoid the smell.

We have a whiteboard in the hall which serves as our shopping list and record of reminders of the week’s appointments and chores. And the bottom of it is always reserved for the list of our evening meals.

It gives me a sense of comfort to know what delicous dinners are coming up – and of course that we have the ingredients in stock to make them. I contentedly observe the quantity of food in the fridge reducing as we eat our way through the week.

No question, this way of planning leaves little space for improvisation, but at the end of a long day at work (and they are all so long at the moment), it makes my life much simpler to not have to decide what to cook on the spot.

I usually make something slow cooked on Sunday for eating later in the week, but almost everything else will be something either easy (jacket potatoes) or quick (egg fried rice) or both.

Of course, it really helps that I like cooking. It’s a bit like meditation for me. The state of absorbed concentration, the creative nature of changing ingredients into food, the happy passing of time at the stove. And of course, at the end, there’s something delicous to bring to the table (or, slightly shamefacedly to the sofa) and share with my people.

My favourite cookbooks

I have a deep and abiding affection for my favourite cookery books, especially the bits that are stained and wrinkled and spattered with use. Here are a few of them

Fresh India. Nothing is here is not delicious. There is literally not one single dud recipe. And the writing is wonderfully evocative and humorous too. My top choices include her fresh mater paneer, root vegetable masala, pineapple raita and mango paneer skewers.

The Roasting Tin. The chicken wings with sweet potato and lime yogurt. Life-changer. And that’s just the beginning. You could happily read this cover to cover, drooling gently as you browse. And the photographs of every dish are lovely.

Zaitoun. Extraordinary and poetic. Special shout-out to the spiced lamb and hummus, smashed avocado, rainbow carrot salad with herb yogurt, the roast chicken with sumac. And there are salads for days. Make EVERYTHING. Fragrant, tasty, delightful.

Nigel Slater‘s books are a delight to read and salivate over. I’ve got more of his books than any other writer’s. My fave is Real Food, but there are so many to choose from and read for hours in a comfy chair. He offers a deep pool of knowledge, experience and reassurance that I can sink contentedly into, knowing there will be something delicious at the end of it.

Queen Nigella is my go-to for anything sweet. And a substantial number of savoury things too. But most especially her chocolate cloud cake, pavlovas, nutella cake, lemon tender cake with blueberry compote, chocolate chip cookies, molten chocolate babycakes, incredibly sticky, spicy, deeply treacly gingerbread and marzipan cake. The list of amazing things to put in your mouth is endless. Incredibly happy-making food.

Nigel and Nigella are like the mum and dad of my cooking.

And, if they’re the parents, then Felicity Cloake is like the kind, clever older sister (although I’m probably actually older than her in real life).

Her book Perfect is soothing and comforting. So much so that, at moments of high anxiety – and there have been a LOT of them in recent months – I read it in bed and it sends me to a happy sleep where things make sense and someone else has done the hard work for you. She also writes the brilliant Perfect column in the Guardian, full of recipes tried and tested by someone I trust so much that I’d leave my child with them. Seriously, all her food always works.